Reflection

A few years ago my grandfather was sick in the hospital. He was my only grandfather and a very unique man. He had a very “round about” way of speaking, like everything he said was a riddle. Few people every understood him, but he always taught me patience and brought a certain kind of understanding for those of us considered “different.” I can say, however, I’ve never met any one quite like him. We didn’t always agree and our communication skills were fair at best, but he helped raise me and had always been there for me. I remember the very last time I saw him, My mom and I was getting ready to leave the hospital room and the little voice inside my head was screaming, "Say it Shauna! Say the words!!! …I love you grandpa!" But I couldn’t. For some reason, fear, embarrassment - I don’t know, I just couldn’t muster up the courage to choke out the words id never spoken before. Maybe I thought I’d get another chance. I’m sure he knew, or knows fine and well that I love him, but he didn’t get to hear it. I will forever regret not saying those words because I never again got an opportunity to do so. And thus, will never let anyone slip through my fingers again, without at least knowing my true feeling for them. I embrace "carpe diem" and seize every moment! That’s not to say I’m emotionally outgoing all the time; I still refused to cry at the funeral.